2 weeks of hectiness, due to the pack schedule of Cardiovascular System Module. tough and pack, yet interesting, really. better though, i like it this way. at least i know i need to stay focus, and put aside the other unimportant minor minor things.

unfortunately, the entire week has been a real, devastating one. physically, emotionally, spritually devastating. the inner conflict is even worse, you know. tiring indeed. this is what we call, a private war within oneself. on my side, and also on the other side. i'm scared i'll lose my grip. i'm scared i cant hold on, no more. please you. i don't like getting involved in this kinda thing. i'm so freaking tired to be the middle person. dari dulu pon.

and please, don't drag me into ur own mess. boleh tak? grow up will you? and act maturely boleh? how i wish i could b ignorant, not that selfish ignorant idiot, but at least, the positive side of it, i wont b hurting so much.
when i'm mad, i prefer to keep queit. when my world is falling apart, i prefer to fix things back on my own. i always thought i could solve things by myself, but sumtimes, you know, its killing me on the inside. its just, and urggh feeling. tau tak? why do you have to do this to me, when i did nothin to you? why do you have to screw things up only bcause of silly little things. let me tell you, its the egoistic part of you. you're such an ego maniac, and do you know how much i hate that?

please everyone. please. i need some respect. i think its the time for me to change. how i wish i could voice out everythin? how i wish i could tell you what exactly i feel? how i wish i could tell you whats going on my mind. how i wish kan.
kenapa kita selalu terlalu fikirkan perasaan org lain, tapi org lain tak pernah kisah kan? penat. sgt penat. thank god, i'm goin back tomorow, to the place where i belong.

i want to go back to my high school days. when everything seemed so wrong, only with a simple-magic-warm-hug, i felt at ease.
i need hugs. :(